Worth It All- Disciple

It’s worth it all
If I can just see You, feel You
It’s worth it all
If there’s just one that sees You, feels You
I know it will be worth it all

All the time it’s taken
To be here in this place
The scars have left their mark
But I’m still running

Forgetting what is behind
I’m moving straight ahead
And I will run with a passion ‘till I reach the end
I won’t let my eyes move left to right
I’ll run with all my heart, I’ll give it all I got

It’s worth it all
If I can just see You, feel You
It’s worth it all
If there’s just one that sees You, feels You
I know it will be worth it all

Remembering all those voices
Arrows that cut me down
There’s something burning in me
That keeps me runningI know it will be worth it all

-Disciple

Those lyrics are what I feel right now. To live for Christ is gain. And it's all worth it to reach souls of people. How I pray I can fulfill my calling and the purpose God has set out before me.

Don't Put God In a Box..."What's in a Christianism?"

Ok, so I should be studying right now but I can't...not while this thought is fresh in my mind...I'll study after I get this out.

This post is purely based on my thinking, I have not looked into whether there is Biblical basis to back up what I am about to say or not...also, I'm writing at Christians or people who have heard Christianisms spoken...I hope you still are open minded when you read this which ironically in part it may seem as if I attack the very sentiment...

Have you ever heard someone say that "You better be careful not to put God in a box?" Probably have...and let me be one (though I know I'm not the only one...Pastor Mullet Man said this before me) to say "You really think you're tough enough to put God in a box?!" HAHAHA Forgive me for laughing at this Christianism but it's ridiculous...we are the ones in the boxes. We build nice safe little walls...God cannot dwell in the boxes that we make so we crawl inside them while He rides the clouds as His chariot. His white hair blowing in the wind, His eyes blazing with fire, His lips spread in a slow smile, and an infectious laugh bellowing from His spirit as He dwells outside the box...I've heard a sermon spoken on this Christianism three times and each time the pastor has warned against being so proud as to think that we can put God in a box. I'm not gonna preach on this danger...I'm not even gonna tell you a sermon on getting out of the box.

What I am going to say is something that I fear the idea that we might end up accidentally putting God in a box if we remain too firm on any given interpretation of scripture may end up doing to us. I worry that if we try too hard not to put God in a box that we might leave ourselves opened up for deception. Look, yes, by sticking too firm to an interpretation that you have on a scripture may be a tad close-minded and I'm not saying close your minds entirely (actually I haven't much said anything yet have I?) but this is what I'm saying... Know what you believe...take a firm stand for what you believe....and know why you are standing there. YES people will think you're nuts, some will be Christians, some won't...but at least you will have a belief...a starting point if you will...don't just pick a scripture, read it and then decide that BAM "this is how I see it...this is how it will be...no one can tell me otherwise" that's not very wise...but if you truly seek to know God and you truly search for truth in the scriptures then Pray first, pray for a sound mind, pray for understanding and solid interpretation of what you read, then...Read. Read the scriptures. When you think you've understood something...look to a Christian that you know to be solid in the word....often times, this would most likely be your pastor though it may not always be...and then test what he or she says against the scriptures and see if that makes sense...then stick with that until God sends you proof contrary to it. If it never comes then keep going, learn more, continue to pray for truth and solid interpretation and read and check and double check and pray some more. But I URGE you...But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect1 Peter 3:15 Basically I urge you to have a solid belief and to treat people with gentleness and respect when sharing that belief...if that belief be proven by scripture to be wrong...then be corrected and stand firm on the belief that you have as a result of that correction. In all cases...do not sit on the fence...make a stand on something or you'll fall for anything.

God Bless

A Case of 6 Days?

Edit: I realize that not everyone will agree with me on these things, and that doesn't bother me, I don't expect that we ever will fully come to a 100% consensus on what happened at the beginning of the creation of Earth, even in Christian communities. I wish we all could but we won't. However something critical to every Christian is this...know what you believe and why you believe it commit to a firm belief that can only be shaken if God gives you proof otherwise....for my reasoning on saying this...stay tuned for my next blog.

Hey,
Thought the subject line really fit the topic. lol. Anyways, I'm not seeking to start a debate, I have no real interest in a debate, these are my thoughts and reasons behind the thoughts...the more I seek answers on this topic the more convinced I am of my position and I will not be swayed on it, (and don't think of it as ignorance or standard reaction of a christian, or creationist...I've actually put thought into this and considered both sides even talked to people I respect about them (and yes some were pastors who have creationistic views but you can't hold a bias because of that)) Ok, that being said...first off I want to state that I do think it matters...this is a personal assertion and I am not sure scripturally if there is a basis for it or not...however I do believe with all that I have in me that it matters whether the earth was created in 6 days or 45 million years even though neither option discredits a creator.

Now here are the things that have strengthened my opinion/faith on this issue....

In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.

And God said, "Let there be light," and there was light. God saw that the light was good, and he separated the light from the darkness. God called the light "day," and the darkness he called "night." And there was evening, and there was morning -- the first day. Genesis 1:1-5

Ok so this first part, since we're talking about creation and the Bible is the account that we're really dealing with, this was my number one source to turn to. I've been praying a lot about this issue and this first section really began to stand out...look at what God did here...he created the constructs of time. It's not a metaphorical, poetical, similitical or any other allusion to light and dark...it's real, day-and-night-light-and-dark-time-to-get-up-time-to-sleep-time...The first thing that God did was create time...time that you and I understand...he didn't work outside of time and then when he was nearly done turn time on and finish things up in six days...he really created time...from there we see a strengthening of this assertion that time has just been created...He called the light day, and the darkness night...then we see a recurring trend of "and there was evening and there was morning"...These days that are mentioned are within the constricts of a day/night rotation of time. I believe that the rest of the Creation telling takes place with God working within those same constricts...in a sense it seems as if God steps into His creation and begins creating...working within time. I know that you're probably thinking that it was written in "poetic" form and as such metaphor is licensed to use, also the fact that it was told to the first man and retold and all that that God may have "told them in terms they would understand"....ok this is another thing that I had trouble with and as such have discussed it with my dad...our theory on this is that...it was told pre-fall...and first I'll show a verse before explaining why this verse:

19 Now the LORD God had formed out of the ground all the beasts of the field and all the birds of the air. He brought them to the man to see what he would name them; and whatever the man called each living creature, that was its name. 20 So the man gave names to all the livestock, the birds of the air and all the beasts of the field. Genesis 2:19-20

Ok, so this theory of why God did not dumb it down into terminology that "adam" could understand is based loosely around this verse...and a fact...but ok...the theory is that pre-fall man had vast knowledge already at his fingertips, not to mention creativity and understanding, he was afterall constantly walking with God and learning and very intelligent...intelligent and creative enough that God brought every creature on earth to him to name...and he did! and to this day every name that adam came up with are surely attached to the animals...though we may have unknowingly called them these names who knows don't care....God said that the names he named them would be their names so I believe that all the names are accurate today...today we are aware that we use only a small portion of our brain, and of all human organs the brain still holds the most mystery... I believe that at the beginning before the fall, man used a much greater portion of their brains and I believe that God felt no need to dumb things down around a creation that He had made perfect....completely perfect, innocent and a little too trusting maybe in some case but perfect even in understanding complex concepts. So I believe that God did not "dumb" things down so that he could understand it. Once again...God said it we should believe it...my dad said that the first step to interpreting scripture is to read it literally first...unless it doesn't make ANY sense literally, unfortunately for evolutionists, in the constricts of language and writing, this portion of scripture makes perfect sense...and in faith...outside of the constricts of language...also makes sense.

Ok, so we also know that God is omniscient right, good, now...picture this...God is able to work within time on everything...lol...k, so God is carefully and masterfully creating a tree, maybe he pauses to sketch a little on his booklet before he starts working at it again, it's a maple tree he sees as he puts the finishing touches on the leaves in his sketch book, he then goes to work putting care into each cell, moving on to give the cells unity and shape, they turn into a root, the roots begin to change as the masters hands travel up the trunk of the tree carefully and diligently as he crafts the bark, that magnificent and protective bark, as he goes up he branches off and builds the first branch, likes it so he makes another and another, decides to make some buds, blows on a few and they open revealing the leaves, he's happy, he stands back and admires his work and notices that it is just turning dawn on the horizon...he worked through the day and night...whew that was quite the job, but it is good... now, you're thinking ok, I can see that, seems to fit God's character...but matt, it's one tree, there are a lot of trees....ok, but he's omniscienct right? SOOOOOOO picture that same picture happening a million times all at the same time....the same God is crafting and designing a million trees in the span of a day, with the same care and diligence that he took on one, and yet he's accomplished millions in the same span because he's God, he's able to work within time with care and patience, remaining true to his character and yet finish great things....

Next the vegetation thing that had me for a loop...you weren't wrong that not everything was created to full height...some were only planted in the created order...some, it was only a seedling that was created and nothing had yet sprung...but the garden, that was different, that was planted fully and full grown in my belief and interpretation...

This is the account of the heavens and the earth when they were created. When the LORD God made the earth and the heavens- 5 and no shrub of the field had yet appeared on the earth [b] and no plant of the field had yet sprung up, for the LORD God had not sent rain on the earth [c] and there was no man to work the ground, 6 but streams [d] came up from the earth and watered the whole surface of the ground- 7 the LORD God formed the man [e] from the dust of the ground and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life, and the man became a living being.
8 Now the LORD God had planted a garden in the east, in Eden; and there he put the man he had formed. 9 And the LORD God made all kinds of trees grow out of the ground—trees that were pleasing to the eye and good for food. Genesis 2:1-9

Ok, so this really threw me for a loop...it almost made me switch right then...ALMOST, however, the fact that they hadn't yet grown did not mean that they weren't created...it was obviously wasreferredd to as "the sixth day" afterall...God's creating MAN! so how was this possible? How was it possible that plants hadn't sprung, yet man was being created...at first I saw that as plants hadn't been created which only pointed out how I had been looking at creation all this time...I'd been looking at every created thing as being full grown when created...when I realized this and re-read this verse I noticed that they had not sprouted but they were already created...and when God created adam food had to exist so God made all kinds of trees grow...in the garden...this isn't hard to believe is it? That possibly for a garden and a man whom God loved very much, he sped things up a bit? I don't think so, in fact, I think that since he had already put all the time and effort, patience and creativity into creating the plants in the first place...that it doesn't even put this outside of God's character to do such a thing...look at the tree withering immediately in the desert...:

19Seeing a fig tree by the road, he went up to it but found nothing on it except leaves. Then he said to it, "May you never bear fruit again!" Immediately the tree withered.
20When the disciples saw this, they were amazed. "How did the fig tree wither so quickly?" they asked.
21Jesus replied, "I tell you the truth, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain, 'Go, throw yourself into the sea,' and it will be done. 22If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer."Matthew 21:19-22

Time sped up there, a tree does not under natural circumstances wither that fast (immediately)...AND it was Jesus (who we know is God) that "sped" up time...if Jesus is God and can do that and still hold true to the character of God then it's not out of the character of God to speed up time for a garden so that it's inhabitant(and later inhabitants) would have food to eat and shelter is it?

And lastly the star issue...I cannot answer why it is that we get light from stars that are "billions" of light-years away, even in the theory that the created earth was done in 45million years doesn't line up with the "BILLION light-years" theory, so I would say that possibly the math is wrong...but the creation of the stars is God's:

14 And God said, "Let there be lights in the expanse of the sky to separate the day from the night, and let them serve as signs to mark seasons and days and years, 15 and let them be lights in the expanse of the sky to give light on the earth." And it was so. 16 God made two great lights—the greater light to govern the day and the lesser light to govern the night. He also made the stars. 17 God set them in the expanse of the sky to give light on the earth, 18 to govern the day and the night, and to separate light from darkness. And God saw that it was good. 19 And there was evening, and there was morning—the fourth day. Genesis 1:14-19

And in this case, I would see it as a mystery, possibly unsolved, possibly oneday solved, but for now...it's not, and now I regret to say, it's past my bed time and I have class in the morning so, farewell! Adieu! lol Have a good night and I hope this helps.
Matthew Clarke

How long has it been?

I sit here listening to Kutless sing the words to a song called "Strong Tower". As I only half listen to the words and half concentrate on what it is that I want to say I decide to skim over a friends blog; I am struck by the raw pouring out and laying down of who he is under all the layers. You know...I was once told that there was a man who wanted to figure out who he was, this man told his professor his plan to take each layer of who he was and strip it away until he knew who he was. The professor posed this question to him: "What if you peel all the layers away only to find you are nothing more than an onion?" ... I like this story, it's simple and yet profound at the same time, and I prefer things that way, this is not to say that I don't crave an intelectual discussion or story as well, I just feel that language does not need to be fluffed up to be beautiful. Anyways that's besides the point... back to the story... I take it to mean that we should not trouble ourselves with the idea of discovering or "finding ourselves" and from personal experience...I would agree, it's not always a wise idea to spend a lot of energy in this area... however, I would like to just sit down and strip away the walls around me so that I could come face to face with whatever lies behind them. I want to be more open and clear like my friend, I want to distance myself from the sins that I have commited and focus on Christ. I want to think about things, but more than that I want to act on my beliefs.

You know...after that last line I look at the words here and I thought about relevance...I thought about all the people I know that are thinking about their faith and trying to figure it out, I thought about how little action accompanies all those thoughts (this has been a sore point to me lately) and I thought about what to write next...and you know what? I felt like...what's the point of writing anything else? is this even relevant? am I just spouting off? yes of course, will it help? I don't know...these thoughts came and made me realize that really...just like everyone else I know, I'm searching...I'm searching for purpose...

I don't and never have seen a life where I get up, put on a suit and tie and head to work from 9-5 and then go home to my family, go to sleep, wake up, head to work, go home, wake up, go to work, go home...ok you get the picture...I know that I need to have a job, and I want to have a family to go home too, otherwise I wouldn't have dated, I wouldn't have asked Sharyl-Lynn to marry me, I wouldn't be planning my wedding with her now... and I want that...I want to marry her, I want to have kids with her, I want to provide for her....but more than that..I want to have direction, I want to be able to give and share direction with my family...I want to spread the Gospel, I want to have a purpose that goes beyond money, or fame, or even just surviving day to day life in North America...I want to leave this world one day knowing that I have fulfilled the purpose that God put me on this earth for. I long for the day when I discover that purpose. When i was little, I dreamt of many things...in my heart...I still hold all those dreams, every single one...

That paragraph brought up two thoughts to me... one was trivial...since I was little I have held the belief that there is significance in what we were named...and that the names that are prophesied over us or that God gives us also contain much significance...that being said Matthew means "Gift of God"...I honestly believe that names contain prophetic meaning, lately, in my heaviness and confusion, I fail to see how I have been much of a gift...also it was prophesied over me that I had the spirit of David (something that holds twice the significance because of a funny coincidence in my own room) and I feel unworthy to have that said of me because of the meaning of the name David...for anyone that's curious David means "Beloved"... a prophecy that I have the spirit of David or heart like David...well...to me tells me that I'm loved, and it also tells me that there is strength, and faith and all those things, (along with warning me of weaknesses in my life) and well...I just don't see those things...I hold fast to this belief that they are prophecies by God and that they will be fulfilled, but in my shortsightedness I have lost focus...

The second thought was that this blog, these words, the style of writing, etc...do they matter? really, does what I write here matter at all? I dunno. Guess I'll see one day...just wanted to get my rants off my chest. take care

Prayer of a Prodigal

Remember me Oh Lord,
And do not forget the love that we shared,
Remember the times where you carried me
Remember the times where you cried with me
Remember me and do not forsake me Jesus.

It's been so long,
Since I have drank of your waters,
Since I have tasted the sweetness of your bread,
So long it has been
That I fear I may never drink again
Or eat from your table.

I have drifted so far, Jesus
I have been gone so long,
Can it be that you will take me back?
Is there hope for a Christian Prodigal?
One that has known you and ran?

Dear God,
I have been a slave to sin
Dear God,
Free me
Dear God,
I have learned to run
and run I have,
Dear God,
Stop me in my tracks
Dear God,
I'm tired
I'm sore
I'm aching inside
My heart burns with a pain so deep
A pain born from the emptiness that I feel apart from you
A pain that can never be healed outside of you I fear
Dear God,
I have tried to heal that pain,
To fill that hole,
To put ointment on the wound
But that ointment has only caused more hurt
That filler has only caused more emptiness
Dear God, Oh God,
Make me seek
And make me seek with such passion and fire that I will not,
No, I cannot stop until I have met you again
Dear God,
Let us love with the love that we did in my youth
Dear God,
Let my sins be nothing more than a thing of the past
Dear God,
Let it be that I burn for you.

Dear God,
You alone are God and against you, only you have I sinned
You alone are God and from you, only you have I ran
You alone are God and for you, only you does my heart long for
You alone are my love, you are what I long for, you are my hearts desire.

Dear God,
Break me
Take me
Make me yours.

Amen.

iD: Individual Designs

Here is another project post from school:

It's for a media planning project. It's a logo for a store.

Zyrtec Ad for Layout Class

Hey Everyone, As you all know, I add pictures quite regularly to this site, everything from ads that I've done in class to pictures inspired by messages I've read or Bible verses. Here is another ad layout that I have done. Comments would be appreciated:

Click on the ad to see it in full

Feast and Be Free

I was inspired to make this picture when I read this verse:

"This is how you are to eat it: with your cloak tucked into your belt, your sandals on your feet and your staff in your hand. Eat it in haste; it is the Lord's Passover."-Exodus 12:11

and also

7Get rid of the old yeast that you may be a new batch without yeast—as you really are. For Christ, our Passover lamb, has been sacrificed. -1 Corinthians 5:7

You see it? Christ is our Passover Lamb! Why might the Israellites have been commanded to eat the lamb the way they were that night? I was told, and I honestly think it is true, that a reason for it was because they were to be ready to go immediately after they finished eating the lamb. They were going to walk into freedom after feasting on the Lamb. In the New Testament we learn that Christ is our Passover Lamb, and we know that "In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God." -John 1:1

So what I gleaned from these connections was this: We are to feast on Christ, on His words, on the Word of God and we are to do so in a way that we are ready to go and walk into freedom.

God Bless!

(Read the Creed, I think it's a good reminder...download it to your comp if you want)